Tuesday, August 02, 2005

I Already Took Out The Driveway. Who's Wants Some Now?!

I very nearly broke my face right off Saturday night. I stepped out of a truck, and the next thing I knew, I came to in my bathroom, watching my blood mixed with water running into my shower drain. Crawled into bed, and later woke up taped and gauzed and reeking of peroxide and dried blood. There are pictures, but I'm not posting them here.

All I can think of to say about it tonight is that I'm damn lucky.

Lucky my boy Rommel was with me, to patch me up and sit until my wife came home from her (much less painful) Night Out With The Girls.

Lucky I slept through the night, without going to the ER for a safety check.

Lucky I didn't break anything (as far as I know; x-rays will be back Thursday), like my nose, my skull, or my teeth. Still don't know how I got by those injuries.

Lucky I didn't lose my left eye, still an awful bloody mess tonight.

Lucky I didn't at least get a concussion and have my brain sloshing against my forehead for a few days.

And most of all, lucky that I've got a truly selfless and doting wife, who bought me presents (like some boss Justice League Unlimited figures) and tended my wounds and never once complained or gave me shit about taking such a ridiculously bad spill in our own driveway.

Speaking of ridiculous, in all the chaos following my stuntman audition, we didn't realize what it was that caused the whole tumble in the first place. As we discovered the next morning (on the way to see Sandy's dad who just lost his leg in a tree-cutting accident--talk about making you feel better about your own injuries), the culprit was my copy of Runaways #6, which fell out of the truck just before I made an ill-fated leap to the driveway.

Runaways. Hilarious. About the only funny thing about this whole weekend of agony.
Oh, all right. I'll post a picture or two. Be warned: if you find banged-up, hungover klutzes to be gross, go no further. If you find banged-up, hungover klutzes to be hilarious (especially if they're not you), then by all means, proceed.


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