Monday, July 24, 2006

I Think Sorkin Rocks. Does This Mean I Think He's ON Rock? Then I'm Sorry. Or Am I?


Aaron Sorkin, the acclaimed wordsmith behind "The West Wing" and the upcoming "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip," was left wishing Friday he could reclaim one public remark.

"I do think television is a terribly influential part of this country and when things that are very mean-spirited and voyeuristic go on TV, I think it's bad crack in the schoolyard," Sorkin told a meeting of the Television Critics Association.

He paused briefly, then asked: "Why did I use that word?"

In 2001, Sorkin was arrested at a Southern California airport and charged with possession of cocaine, mushrooms and marijuana. He entered a drug treatment program after pleading guilty to a misdemeanor and two felony counts.

I'm sorry, are the members of the Television Critics Association actually all
schoolchildren? Or crack dealers? No? Then why'd Sorkin feel so bad at his choice of words? Because he made some mistakes, copped to them, and moved on, just like any number of plumbers, airline pilots, secretaries, CEO's, and (probably) a television critic or two?

Sorkin shouldn't have played the scene all sheepish (despite the inspired follow-up quotes from fellow NBC employees Matthew Perry and Bradley Whitford that showed that the cast has his back). His point (actually a reiteration of a point one of his characters makes in the premiere episode of Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip)was a valid one, and now it's obscured by the connection his druggy simile had with his personal life.

And that connection in and of itself is actually kinda nifty, if you think about it. Here's a writer of fictional characters who's applied a part of skillful fiction to his own non-fictional life: he's made a change. Few are the number of successful and enduring characters on TV, in movies, or in books that haven't made some change or at least have been given the opportunity. If Sorkin can imbue his latest cast of characters with the stuff of his changes, of his ability to own his past, then he'll have done another masterful job.

And we should let him try.

Thursday, July 20, 2006

Fear The Moustache

In a show of solidarity for my brothers in Deadly Fists of Kung Fu, on the road this week and recording in Athens, Georgia with David Barbe, I present my 10 day old mustache...

Wow. It looks even sexier on the internet.

Saturday, July 01, 2006

Your Mom DID Say You'd Go Blind

Eddie Griffin (the Minnesota Timberwolves' bench valet, not the semi-funny comedian) should've heeded mama's warning...

Effective multi-tasking? Emphasising the word effective, that's a skill I envy and admire. Totally futile attempts at multi-tasking? Comedy gold, my friends, comedy gold. If you're too lazy to click on the above link, here's the long and short of it: Griffin crashed his Escalade into a parked Suburban on the curb outside a retail establishment. Immediately prior to that (according to witness' recounting of what Griffin said), he was not only drinking, he was also watching porn on the in-dash DVD player and masturbating.

Laughter and schadenfreude aside, This incident troubles me for two reasons:

ONE: Had it occurred in the off-season, I might have been willing to cut "This Is My Solo Project" Griffin some slack. But I just found out it happened after a freaking game; This was an in-season whack job. How is it possible, given the network of NBA-ready babymamas and other places to put your double-double-a-night goo, that even a borderline Euroleague baller like Griffin couldn't find a girl to "take the wheel" while he actually kept both hands on the wheel and at least an eye on the road? (INTERJECTION: Speaking as someone who's been both a driver and a masturbator for, God, over 20 years? Griffin should have been able to keep at least one eye on the road; no matter the circumstances, I always know where my penis is, within an eighth-inch or so. He couldn't make an educated guess where and what to pull?)

TWO: In the age of perpetually scrolling ESPNNews, where we have conspiracy theories as lurid as "the reason Roger Clemens just now signed with the Astros is because he's secretly serving a 50-day steroid sentence", how did this brilliant event go under the pop-media radar? Was Jimmy Kimmel too busy analyzing how he mangaged to bag Sarah Silverman? Eddie Griffin gets an under-rug special, while gay-ass[**] Michael Strahan gets all of his laundry, clean, dirty, ALL of it aired? This kind of arbitrary scandal-squashing will make me doubt just how sincere someone like Mark Schlereth or Al Michaels is from now on.

(**) I have no doubt in my mind, Mr. Strahan, that your junk is for Ladies Only. Please don't: sue me, slap me, or send your buddy Tiki Barber and his brother Ronde to come to Pensacola and remove every single hot chick from the county.